Lame Post

I'm home alone tonight.  "Alone" meaning me and 5 children.  That's a funny definition of alone.  Seth is at scouts.  (seems like i'm "alone" a lot lately) And I'm tired.  Tired of mothering.  That's not good to say, is it?  I'm not like permanently tired of it, just currently.  Like I need some quiet.  Kimball is currently sitting next to me telling me about the motivational fun run guys that have been at her school.  I love her.  I love all my kids.  I also love the quiet that comes at the end of the day, when after an hour of trying to get them in bed, there is actual quiet.  The time between them going to bed and me going to bed seems to be getting shorter and shorter.

On another little motherly note:
Nash is truly the naughtiest and cutest kid ever.  How can a kid be so incredibly disobedient and still make me smile all the time?  Currently he is eating a muffin.  His 8th muffin.  He's taken one bite out of each of them and then put it back.  I moved all of them except the one he had started so he couldn't reach them, he got a chair and found a fresh one.

I'm on Seth's computer so i'm just going to randomly choose some of his pictures to post.  This post is super lame.  Maybe pictures will help lessen its lameness.

  

Sugar Highs and Meltdowns

Last week was crazy. This week is right on track to battle last week's madness. 

I think I've decided that I don't like Halloween on a Thursday. It just stretches it all out too much. Starting the weekend before since apparently there is some law against celebrating anything Halloween after the 31st. The kids just finally finished all the candy from last weekend's festivities (and by finished I mean I threw away every piece I found and the last half of the bag after they left for school today). And in two days we get to do it all again which means another sugar-spike-and-crash filled weekend. 

I know, I know I should just take the candy away and slowly distribute over the months to come... But I'm not that mom. I'm the scarf it all down, make yourselves sick and be done with it in 2 days type of mom. 

This week I'll be battling it all mostly on my own. Seth has work meetings tonight, young men's activity tomorrow night and a scout camp out on Friday/Saturday. I promise to be grateful that he will be there for Halloween night. Hats off to single moms. I'm pretty sure I'd curl up in a ball and let life go on without me. You should see what the house looks like and what the kids eat on nights when Seth's not here. Or maybe you shouldn't. It's rather embarrassing. 

Ok done with the Halloween griping. All the candy wrappers and meltdowns aside, I do love to see my kids all dressed up and looking cute. Seth and I went to a costume party this year. We were not nearly as cute as our kids. I'm hoping that those pics have all been destroyed. 

Charmed...

Today was just an average day. Nothing too exciting or out of the ordinary but I feel so blessed. I feel like I live a charmed life. 

If cameras followed me around you'd think I was crazy for saying that. I think I swept the floor 4 times and it could probably have used one more go at it before bed. Nash has pink eye and the goop oozing from his eye is far from charming. Jensen's teething so there has been a LOT of crying and whining (mostly from him but also some from me!).  And I've had a crazy off and on headache this afternoon. Despite it all I can't go to bed at night without feeling so incredibly grateful for all that I have. My children are happy and (mostly) healthy. My husband has a good job and he's über helpful at home. I have a baby that will cuddle me and snuggle me (even if it's only for a few minutes at a time). 

I have everything I could ever hope for. And so much more. 

I need to be better at remembering/realizing this during the children's waking hours. It's always easier when they're asleep. 

Sweet Kimball

My sweet little Kimball turned 8 last week and was baptized the day after her birthday. We like to celebrate bdays all week long so in true Avey fashion we had  a full week of fun. 

We actually started a week early with her friend "party". We kept it small this year and she just invited her 2 closest friends (and McKay of course) to go see the 1D movie. It was the last day it was in the theaters and they had the place all to themselves. It was so much fun. I hope these girls are BFFs forever. 

Monday night we went out to dinner with Nana and Papa to celebrate. 

And then because I was feeling overwhelmed with the baptism prep we skipped the big breakfast at home on the actual birthday and just went to Denny's. 

Friday was her baptism. It was amazing. There was such a wonderful spirit there and other than the font half emptying and it being every very low everything went perfectly. We had a dinner here at home afterwards and I loved having all of our friends and family here. 

And on Sunday we celebrated with Seth's family. Sloan (her cousin) and Kimball always get to share a bday party and they are so good about it. 

Fun week. I love that little girl so much. She's a little too much like me which scares me for our future. But for now we are having a blast. 

Nap Time

Both my little ones are napping right now. This should be the time to "go go go". There's so much I could get done. But it's so quiet. My house is calm and peaceful. And so here I sit. There's a pile of laundry next me. And I'm slowly getting through it. I know when they wake up I'll be all stressed out and wish if done more. But for right now this feels so nice. 

 

Update on my Little Ones

Nash is 2 1/2. In every way. He's demanding and volatile. Happy one minute laying on the floor crying the next.  Commercials can send him over the edge. (He doesn't understand why you would ever need to interrupt a show) but as soon as it comes back on he's singing and dancing again. He's also absolutely adorable. We call him the happy maker. He can make the grumpiest of siblings smile in a matter of seconds. 

Update on J will have to wait. He's screaming. And it's back to reality. 

Day of Rest

The first few months of my mission I hated really didn't love Sundays.  They were my biggest adjustment.  Pre-mission they were blissful, wake up later than normal-go to church for a few hours-come home-take a nap-eat a home cooked (not by me) meal-and just chill for the rest of the day-days.  

I remember my first Sunday in the mission field thinking "this is anything but restful! what happened to my day of rest?"  After a few months I acclimated a bit and just enjoyed the fact that three hours of church, which could easily be stretched in to 4+, meant those were hours not spent on my bike and/or knocking doors.  Sundays weren't as bad as I thought but I still dreamed of coming home from my mission and welcoming back those restful Sundays.  And I did.  I think.  But I am having a hard time remembering what a restful Sunday feels like.  

Five kids is rarely restful, even in the middle of the night but after getting them all gussied up and then spending 3 hours practicing reverence and harnessing all their energy, 5 kids at home in our rather "cozy" house the Sabbath day is anything but restful.  Every few weeks I vow that Sunday meals will from now on be simple to prepare and easy to clean up, I have a really hard time sticking to that.  Today I went for a meal that everyone likes and "wouldn't take too much work."  I am such a bad judge of that. Add to that the fact that I decide to throw together rolls 15 minutes before needing to walk out the door because "rolls just go with this meal."  Why do I do this to myself?  In the end it took twice as long to make and it will (eventually) take way too long to clean up.  But it tasted good.  There was no belching and not even one glass of milk was spilled, so that's a huge accomplishment.  (After having to clean up dinner by herself, I think Kimball has, at least for now, learned her lesson about belching at the dinner table.)

So I just plopped the kids in front of the tv and told them to give me a few minutes to "rest".  And what do I choose to do?  Sit down and blog about how it's not a restful day.

I think the conclusion I am coming to is that I really do put this all on myself.  There's no one to blame but me.  If I lay down right now how many minutes do you think I could get in before someone comes and interrupts?  Hey at least I don't have to go jump on a bike in a skirt and spend the next 4 hours knocking doors.  It's all about your perspective ladies.

Better than it Was

When Seth and I were first married we lived in a tiny 1 bedroom apartment (didn't we all?)  It was a whopping 680 square feet

After McKay came along we had this awesome little nightly ritual where we would put her down in her pack-n-play in our room and then when we were ready for bed we'd very carefully pick up the pack-n-play and shimmy it through the bedroom door out into the eat-in area of kitchen.  At least once a week we would bump up against a wall and wake her up.  It was a fun little process.  Every night.

We have gradually made our way up to a bigger home.  Still not huge but easily 2.5x as big as that first quaint little establishment.  

A few weeks ago on a Saturday while we were doing our weekly big clean (something we try to do every Saturday) I remembered how Seth and I used to do something similar when we were first married.  We would deep clean pretty much every Friday or Saturday.  We would clean that tiny little one bedroom/one bath apartment for 2+ hours.  Two hours!  What in heaven's name would take us two hours?  And how dirty/messy could it have possibly been?  Two of us cleaning for 2 hours and no children of mess making age.  Do you know what my house would look like now if I had 4 uninterrupted man hours of cleaning a week?  I don't know if our housekeeping skills were seriously lacking or if our standards were significantly higher, maybe a little of both.

Oh how our lives have changed.  In so many ways.  10 years and 5 kids makes a huge difference.  

Today I cleaned/laundered/tidied the house pretty much all day long.  Add in diapering, feeding, kissing, hugging, channel changing, homework helping, etc, etc and the house looks better but far from amazing.  

My new mantra "It's better than it was!"

Blog Makeover - Here we go again

I think its time for a blog makeover.  I have gotten lazy.  Facebook and Instagram are so easy that I've kind of given up on my little blog and I am missing her.  Writing is therapeutic for me.  A kind of escape from my sometimes, brain-numbing life.  (A life that I absolutely adore even if it doesn't "exercise" my intellect much.) And I was reminded recently that we should be keeping a journal.  Earlier today while looking for an old picture I jumped on here and ended up reading a bunch of posts from 5+ years ago.  There were things that I had completely forgotten about and I realized that there are probably a lot of things happening in our lives right now that 5 years from now I will have little or no recollection of... so here I go.

I am recommitting to keeping up with this, to taking a few minutes, a couple times a week, to just purge my brain a bit.  And to document our lives.

I do not commit to catching up on all that I have missed.

I'll just give this one brief recap of the past 6 months.

We now have 5 children.  And in case we ever were to forget that there are five of them, strangers regularly count them for us and then ask if they are really all ours.

The summer was long and hot.  (We live in Phoenix.  And I have 5 kids nine and under, thus the long part)

School is back in and now life is good as we are finally moving into fall (which the rest of the country would refer to as summer weather).

Football started this last week.  My life is complete.

Eggos and the Syrup that Goes Along with Them

I stepped in syrup yesterday morning.  Then I sat in it.  Followed by 20 minutes of cleaning up syrup that stretched from the kitchen to the dining room into the living room and down the hall.  (Granted that's not a ton of square footage in our house but still)  An hour later I went to put on my flip flops to go outside and yep, you guessed it, syrup.  In my flip flop.  Then I swiftly and with much volume and authority banned Eggos from the house!  No more I declared.  That's it.  DONE.  And while I was at it I also declared (for the 718th time) no more eating breakfast or any other meal at the coffee table.  

Today the kids had Eggos for breakfast.  And they ate them at the coffee table.  I am weak.  I have no real gumption, no backbone as they say.  Ok well sometimes I do.  But at 6:30 in the morning after being woken up multiple times in the wee hours of the morning and 7 weeks into the summer break... I have little or no motivation left.  Eggos they can get all by themselves.  They don't even have to wake me up.  And at that point my brain has no ability to process the more logical and sensible choice (get up and get them something else so that I don't have to deal with syrup-house later.) 

Three weeks from tomorrow school starts.  The syrup messes will be less frequent and the house will stay cleaner for longer (right?  It will, won't it?).  Then, almost magically, my kids will awake happy, pour themselves a bowl of healthy cereal, put the milk away, get themselves ready, brush their teeth and skip out the door and 6 blissful hours later they will jump off the bus happy to see me and ready to obligingly sit and quietly do their homework all while holding hands and singing "Love at Home".  I'm going to refrain from looking back at prior posts for how I was feeling at the end of the school year.  

22 days.  Yes, I am counting.

Laundry & Peanut Butter Sandwiches

I'm wondering if its possible that I've been wrong about something. 

Most days I am prone to think that I am the only mother that struggles to keep her house clean. Or the only mother that lets her kids watch more tv than is "acceptable". I am definitely the only mother who goes to bed with my makeup still on (that is if it actually got on in the first place) and with a pile of dishes in the sink. I'm starting to wonder though if maybe just maybe... I'm wrong.

I think it might be possible that a whole bunch of us are all just pretending to be cleaner, smarter, more put together than we really are.  

We know some one's stopping by or our visiting teachers are coming so we quickly move away all the laundry (in my case it gets tossed in my room) and throw on a clean non-spit-up-smelling shirt (probably grabbed out of that basket of laundry which may or may not ever actually get put away) and some lip gloss and act like we've got it all under control.  (Please tell me I'm not the only one!)

My sister (who is, in my mind, the epitome of the "got it all together mom") texted me the other day (a week or so after delivering her 7th baby) her text said "I am such a wreck today, emotional mess, can't stop crying and then I throw my back out which has made it worse!!  What is wrong with me? Oh yeah I just had a baby.  Just needed to vent, don't call me because I won't be able to talk...then to top it all off a friend stopped by to bring a gift and I couldn't hold the tears back, so embarrassing!!"

Embarrassing?  You just gave birth to your 7th child and you are embarrassed because you cried in front of a friend?  I told her thank you.  Thank you for being human.  It's reassuring to a sub par mom like me who feels like I am the only one who has breakdowns.  And at the same time I am going to thank you from that friend, you have no idea how good it must have felt for her to know that her effort to be a good friend was appreciated and more than that... needed.  It also must have in a small little non-judgmental way felt good to know that you aren't as perfect as she thought you were.

I in turn thank my friends who allow me to see their houses in a state of disarray.  It is so comforting.  I promise I'm not judging you, after all I am a woman, so I am judging myself and knowing that your kids make messes that you can't keep up with makes me feel just a tad bit better about me.

I am not going to stop trying to be a better mother, wife, housekeeper, cook, etc, etc.  I feel like that's what life is all about, improving ourselves, getting just a little better every day.  But I am committing myself to stop believing that I am the only one who isn't 100% successful just yet.  I am going to stop comparing myself (and my house) to my friend who has 2 kids (both in school) and a housekeeper.  My house will never look like hers.  And that is just fine.  I may still clean up a bit if someone is coming over but don't be surprised if you show up and there is laundry in baskets in the living room (or even just dumped on the couch waiting to be folded).  This is my life right now.  And I love it.  Even with the piles of laundry and half-eaten peanut butter sandwiches!

Happy 10 Years!

**I started this a week ago and then decided I needed to put a picture with it but never found the picture and then life got busy, we went on a little 10 year anniversary trip and...  So here it is. 


Ten years ago this week I was getting ready to marry the (unlikely) man of my dreams.  It was not love at first sight.  I don't think either of us even considered the other a candidate. He wasn't really into "older" women and I had never dated a skinny blond guy.  I was more into tall dark and beefy.    But we became fast friends and ended up hanging out quite a bit.  I had just finished at the University of Utah and he was just starting his second year.  I was adamant that I would not be putting a husband through college and he was convinced he would not marry a sister return missionary.  So he was a safe friend.  One that I didn't have to try to impress or worry about what I said or how I acted.  I was free to be me.

At the time I lived with 3 (sometimes more) roommates and one very big obnoxious and unruly boxer/ridgeback mix. (Seth is extremely allergic to dogs)  Our place was normally a mess. I'm not sure how the friendship morphed into a relationship other than I mistakenly thought he was trying to hold my hand during a devotional and "let him" in turn scaring the heck out of him because apparently holding hands is more significant than even kissing (men are weird, how can holding someone's hand be more committal than making out? that makes no sense at all.)  Anyway, he decided to give it a chance and for that I am ETERNALLY grateful.

It didn't take long before I knew that Seth was a good choice.  I knew he would make me happy.  I knew that when I prayed about whether or not I should marry him the answer was loud and clear.  But I had no idea how blessed my life would be with him.  He is the man of my dreams (dreams I didn't even realize were worth dreaming about at the time.)  He has taught me so much.  His example is inspiring and encouraging.  He is quite literally the most amazing father and husband any girl could ever dream of.  I am so incredibly grateful for him.

My mission president's wife told us that we should marry above ourselves.  Marry a man that will take you to the celestial kingdom, kicking and screaming if necessary she would say.  That is Seth.  I am blessed in spite of my faults and because of his righteousness.

Lessons from a Child

Let's see if I can do a "long story short" post.

Last night for Family Home Evening treat we went to QT.  (yes I take my kids to a gas station for their treat.  They love it and it's cheap.)  

As we were leaving a man asked me for 50 cents to buy a coffee.  I rummaged through my purse to find change and gave him a dollar or so.  

A conversation then ensued regarding homeless people, how they become homeless, what we should/can do to help them, etc. etc.  

Kimball then said "I pray for homeless people when I say my personal prayers."  

Luc in a very sad, tender voice; "I've never prayed for homeless people in my prayers."

45 minutes later kneeling in our living room for family prayer.  

Luc's Prayer: Heavenly Father, please bless the homeless people.  Bless them that they can find some money and save it so they can buy a home.  And please bless the poor people that they can find some money somewhere too.

I learn so much from these sweet little ones.  Everyday.  

Anti-Dentite

I have dental anxiety.  Seriously.  I mostly blame it on the first dentist I took McKay to (4 years ago).  She was a bully.  Or her assistant/hygienist lady was a bully.  I left feeling like the world's worst mom and wondering how in the world we would ever be able to afford the $3800 treatment plan they had "suggested".  Strongly suggested.  They refused to work with me on other options.. these were baby teeth after all and would eventually fall out.  Anyway, it was a debacle   We went to a second dentist, who ended up doing about $600 worth of work and assured me that it wasn't all my fault.  

McKay has ridiculously weak teeth.  We brush.  We try to floss on a regular basis and her teeth are just a mess.  I hate taking her in.  Every time I leave there I swear I'm going to make Seth take her the next time but it never happens.  

She had 2 teeth pulled today.  Poor thing.  I promise (once again) to be vigilant with her dental hygiene.  

At least we got a fake mustache out of it.  That almost makes it all worth it.    

So Blessed

I am so incredibly blessed.  There are things I wish for and dream of but they are just "things."  I honestly have every blessing I could possibly need and so much more.  

We blessed swet baby Jensen yesterday and it was so wonderful to be surrounded by so many friends and family.  My children will never lack for love or attention, that is for sure.  

I should have taken more pictures but I was too busy soaking it all in...

and on a side note, in preparation for all of our guests we finally got some pics up on the wall.  This little arrangement only took Seth and I about 2 hours to throw together!  Who knew putting pictures up could be such a major project.

Dos Meses

Can't believe my "tiny guy" is already 2 months.  I already need to purge his dresser of all his newborn clothes :(  But if giving up his newborn clothes is the trade off for him sleeping through the night (9 hours last night!  *knocking on wood) then I'll take it.  Mama needs her sleep.

1 week (? more or less)

1 month

2 months

Gratitude and Mondays

Mondays need to be my gratitude day.  When I was young and single I never really minded Mondays, just another day in the week and since I could go out and socialize on a Monday night (or any other night for that matter) what was the difference?  As of late I have found Mondays to be hard.  And I blame it all on Seth.  He's just too darn helpful over the weekend.  He makes everything way too easy (or easier at least.)  I wake up Monday morning and I miss him.  I roll my eyes at my children and there's no one there to reciprocate my frustrations and turn it into humor.  We really are quite funny, at least we think we are.  Anyway, I'm not here to sulk.  I was just having a rough morning after a short not so restful night, I went in my room to say my prayers (which I should have done before I ever left my room) and as I knelt down I felt so incredibly ungrateful.  My little pity party was over.  They usually don't last long but I always feel bad for even being sad or frustrated, I have so much.  So here's today's gratitude list:

1. Seth.
2. My Children.  All 5 of them.  Even the 2 that are keeping me up all night.
3. Press 'n Seal.  I hate saran wrap, press n seal makes my life just that much easier.
4. My new couch that's coming today.
5. Craig's List and the crazy lady that paid me money to come and take away my old nasty couch that I couldn't even stand to look at anymore.
6. The opportunity to teach a mission prep class last night with Seth.  
7. The amazing youth that came to that class and are getting ready to go out and serve.
8. Diet Caffeine-Free Coke
9. Tax Returns
10. my iPhone

I Heart J Dog

I finally got Jensen sufficiently fed and sleeping peacefully so that I could get some laundry folded.  

I am getting way behind on laundry.  It's one of the things that has been put on the back burner.  Thank goodness for an excess of clothing.  

As I'm sitting folding laundry I start to get a tad bit emotional.  Not like crying emotional but just twinges of sadness.  J's little clothes are looking much littler than him.  Meaning he's growing.  

He's getting bigger everyday.  In fact he's probably growing right now while I'm folding laundry instead of holding him.  

Is he really my last little newborn?  He has to be, I can't do this again, the nights are killer, but the thought of not doing it again is also heart wrenching. 

In other news...

 The girls have nicknamed Jensen, J-Dog.  Does he look like a J-Dog?

Luc had a birthday!  Can't believe my little man is FIVE!

The girls ran their first 5K - So proud of them!

Nash is preparing for the X Games

Name that Avey

I told Seth today that I didn't think Jensen looked like the other kids...  um I think I might be mistaken.  

Moments...

In case any of you were wondering, life with 5 children is hard.

It's not all that much different than 3 or 4 but the logistics of it all gets a little trickier.  Like how do I get all the laundry done and the dishes washed and dinner made and nurse the baby and make sure the 20 month old isn't using the toilet lid as a dry erase board.  (also in case you were wondering, while toilet seats look a lot like a dry erase boards dry erase marker does not wipe off quite as easily.)

So I've decided that it might not all get done every day or possibly any day. (not like it always got done every day before but at least I knew it was possible some days.)

I'm trying to enjoy the little moments that seem to come and go so fast.  Jensen is already getting so big. I looked at him this morning and realized that the newborn-ness in him is fading all too quickly.  And knowing that this is probably our last that is a tad bit heartbreaking.  Not that I think I could ever do 6, I couldn't, which it why this is the last, but it's still sad to think I won't experience this again.  At least not exactly like this.

So even though this is what a morning shower sometimes looks like...

I am trying hard to live in the moment and enjoy what I have right now, (even  if that includes piles of laundry and sinks full of dirty dishes) heaven knows I will soon be looking back and missing these crazy chaotic days.

Baby Talk

Just a couple quotes from the past couple weeks:

Luc: Mom what are you looking for?
Me: Pants for Little Man
Luc: Pants for Little Man or pants for Tiny Man?
(I was referring to Jensen but apparently Little Man is only Nash's name, Jensen is Tiny Man!)


Me explaining to Luana that we will not be having another baby: I am 99% sure that this is our last.
McKay piping in from the back seat: Well I'm 100% sure we are having one more, and that's 1% more sure than you!"

Jensen Emmett

I've been meaning to do this for a week and I know I need to do it before I forget but hello, I have 5 kids now!! I'm still trying to wrap my brain around that one.  Seth and I have been married for less than 10 years and we just outnumbered ourselves by more than 2 to 1!  I sometimes think, what are we even thinking?  And I'm quite sure there are more than a few people/acquaintances/friends who are thinking the same thing.  In the middle of the madness I have to just remind myself that this is our life, it is who we are, insanity and all, we chose it and I would say that 90% of the time we love it.  And loving your life that much ain't too shabby.

Number five came into this world way differently than the other four.  I have never really, fully gone into labor completely on my own.  My contractions never really do anything on their own and they don't end up getting me to full on labor on my own.  I've had pitocin with all the others. This time was so different.

Here's the timeline:

7:30 pm - Out running errands with Luana (our exchange student) who was leaving to go back home the next morning.  I told her that despite all her prayers there was virtually no way she would meet Jensen before she left, I take longer than 12 hours to have a baby and nothing had even started yet.

9:00 pm - Put the kids to bed.  And finally sat down to relax.  Had a few contractions and decided to sit there a while longer in hopes that they would do something.  I had a dr's appt the next day and we were hoping he would tell us I was far enough along to go ahead and schedule something.

9:30 pm - Get up and walk around.  Usually walking around makes my contractions stop.  Contractions are really intense and only like 3-5 minutes apart.  I told Seth that some of them I couldn't tell when one stopped and the next one started.  Let me just explain, I have never experienced this before.  I know crazy, it's number 5, how do I not know that I am in active labor?  Good question.

9:35 pm - I call my sister (pregnant with #7) to ask how long the contractions should be consistent like that before I go to the hospital.  (in the past they've always stopped after 20 minutes or so)  She didn't answer.  I call her home phone.  No answer.  (come to find out her husband woke her up and told her she should check her phone because it might be me calling)  She called me back and said "get to the hospital."

9:45 pm - Seth's mom was out of town.  We had no plan.  No bag packed.  No one to stay with our kids.  I call my friend Laura and tell her I "might" need her.

10:00 pm - Laura shows up.  I'm still packing a bag in between really super-crazy-intense contractions. I wake up McKay to tell her we're leaving for the hospital and we'll call her when/if Jensen shows up.  (I was still somehow not sure I was actually in labor!)

10:05 pm - I'm standing by the front door waiting on Seth, Laura is like "where the heck is Seth?" - he was cleaning Luc's room because he felt bad that it was messy for Laura.  She goes and tells him to take me to the hospital already.  We leave.  I can barely get in the car the pain is so intense.  I have never felt anything like that.  (I've always had an epidural by 5-6 cm at the most)

10:06 pm - Seth tries to turn around and go back to the house because he forgot his inhaler and his laptop. (how nerdy is that?)  I (so out of character) tell him absolutely not, we do NOT have time.  This urgency, shocked even me.  I almost told him sorry and that he could go back if he wanted to.

10:07 - 10:25 pm - The drive to the hospital was crazy.  I was trying to remind myself how to breath.  I took a birthing class before McKay but it was all pretty much a blur.  The contractions were now no more than a minute apart and I felt like I was dying.  Seth called the hospital to tell them we were on our way.  He was driving 60 in a 40-45 mph zone.

10:25 pm - we get to the hospital and I can't even get out of the car, let alone walk.  Seth ran in to get a wheelchair.  He rolls me in and I am groaning, moaning and very nearly screaming.  I was so embarrassed. I kept apologizing to people.  We get up to the Labor and Delivery reception desk and they start asking us questions like "who is your pediatrician?" Seth was like, what the heck, seriously, my wife is ready to give birth in this wheelchair and you are asking who our pediatrician is.  They finally buzz us back, the triage nurse comes out and asks questions, I yell, "I am going to have this baby right now!"  The nurse, wisely decides to skip the triage room and take me right to delivery.  We get in the room, I stand up, the nurse says "has your water broken?" - "nope, oh wait, yep, now it has" - She pulls off my pants and I, yelling again, say "I AM PUSHING, I CAN'T STOP PUSHING!" -

10:30 pm - she gently pushes me on to the bed and with in about 30 seconds he's out.  That's it.

Good thing we didn't go back for Seth's inhaler!  Just sayin'.

Did you catch that?  Wimpy ol' me had a baby al' natural!!!  Crazy!  AND, we don't have a bill from an anesthesiologist!  Cool little bonus.

Jensen Emmett Avey

7 lbs 13 oz - 20 in

Look who got to meet Emmett!  

McKay originally wanted to come to the birth, it didn't work out but she was there just 30 minutes after.  Not bad.

This beautiful picture is courtesy of Rachael Ann Lewis... A good friend and an amazing photographer.  www.rachaelannelewisphotography.com 

The kids are SO good with him!  They just love having a baby in the house.

He's an Angel Baby!

I have a super hero for a husband. Sundays from 11-2 are currently my sanity hours!  Oh and to make things in our lives even more "interesting", Seth was called to be YM President 4 days after Jensen was born.

He sleeps A LOT!!  I'm not complaining.

Kimball will do anything I ask as long as her "reward" is holding Jensen.

What in the Name of Sam Hill Happened to My Blog?

I do believe my blog was hijacked and held hostage for the entire month of December.  Apparently being 8 months pregnant, the holidays, remodeling our living and dining room, all while the kids were out of school for the break was just more than this frazzled and unorganized mama could handle.  So I guess technically it wasn't hijacked, I was just on hiatus.  Although, if I'm not mistaken, hiatus actually means a "break" and I wouldn't technically call it a break.  Nonetheless, I checked out of the blogger world for a bit.

But now I am on a different kind of hiatus... a hiatus from sleeping through the night.  So might as well do something "productive."

The logical thing here would be to update my blog.  Bring you all, if there's still anyone out there, up to date on our lives over the past month and make a record of our wonderful Christmas season. But who's logical at 4:45 am on a Sunday morning?  Not me.  I'm rarely logical.  I'm way better at random and spontaneous.

So random it is.

I am 9 months pregnant.  Here are my gripes about being 9 months pregnant.

1. If I'm not going to have this baby in the next day or two then there is no need for sporadic and inconsistent contractions that lead me to believe that I am going into labor when in fact I am not.  Braxton Hicks and/or prelabor contractions are deceitful and annoying.
2. I had an epidural with McKay when I was dilated to a 2.  I have now been walking around, living and functioning at a 4 for over a week.  What's up with that? 
3. I will inevitably adjust to lack of sleep when my cute little bundle arrives and has me up half the night with feedings and changings and all manners of "need".  So why does my body/mind feel the need to start this lack of sleep schedule weeks before his actual arrival?  Wouldn't it seem more appropriate to get lots of really really good sleep in preparation for upcoming events?  One would think.
4. And finally why am I griping about still being pregnant when in fact I know good and well this baby is much easier to tote around and care for inside my body than he will be once he's out?

My non-gripe is this, I love babies (especially my own) and I am so ready to meet Jensen.  I am unbelievably excited, although not at all actually ready (no bags packed, no plans made for the other 4 children) to go to the hospital and give birth to this precious little spirit.  I know my life is going to be crazy and chaotic, not that it isn't already, but I am overjoyed, almost to tears, thinking about holding him and cuddling him and being his mom.  (check back with me in a couple weeks and please remind me of this.)

I thought I had so much more randomness to share but apparently the wee hours have sucked it from my brain.  Hopefully, my next post will include pictures of our newest addition.  

Now I will, as is customary, fall asleep just in time for the kids to wake up and beg me to pour a bowl of cereal that they are perfectly capable of pouring themselves but somehow enjoy and consume more heartily if their sleep deprived mother has prepared it for them.  Life as a mother.  I love it.